It’s your dream come true, so why aren’t you in the throws of giddy romance when planning your big day?
For many couples, the lead-up to their wedding can be pretty stressful—from worrying about seating arrangements to fretting over the perfect frock; it’s easy to get overwhelmed…
You get wrapped up in all the details and forget that there’s more to life than flowers, table decorations, and that oh-so-perfect speech. Before you know it, stress can start to take over, and you’re knee-deep in to-do lists, arguing over the invitations, and having sleepless nights.
Follow my five top tips for overcoming wedding stress to make the process a much more enjoyable experience, and get excited for the lead-up to your special day so it runs as smoothly as possible…
1. Understand What You Can Control
Most people go through their lives not knowing what controls them, and they wonder why they get stuck or feel overwhelmed. But you simply can’t control your mind unless you know what to do with it.
Understanding how your mind works unlocks the key to changing your behavior, so let’s look at why planning a wedding day is making you feel stressed in the first place:
Having certainty is a powerful driving human need and it completely throws us when this goes away; we feel unsafe, out of control, and lost.
When we have a wedding to plan, so many variables come up, which can make us feel uncertain. For example, we can’t predict the weather, other people’s behavior, or the traffic on the day. We worry about minute details, such as that family member who might play up and embarrass us, torrential rain that will ruin the photos, or the wedding transport breaking down, making us late.
However, the way to get through this is to decide that YOU are the certainty. Decide today that you can control your behavior and how you react to things.
It’s impossible to know what life will throw up, but it is possible to control how we react.
Instead of looking outside of yourself, give yourself the certainty you need—know that whatever happens on the day that it will all be okay, and you are in control. You have the inner resilience, the flexibility, and the mindset to be certain that the wedding will be amazing no matter what happens.
2. Remember, the Worry Is Only Temporary
When you add stress and overwhelm into what is supposed to be a celebrative day, it causes you pain.
If we know something will end and have a time limit on it, we can digest this information and process it to easily deal with and cope with it.
Our minds react to instruction, so when we tell our minds that this stress is only temporary, we can begin to eliminate the pain associated with it.
The same applies to your wedding planning—this overwhelming feeling will not last forever.
When you are in the midst of organizing your ceremony, it’s good to take stock and know that each task can be easily achieved. You can reduce the stress, and “pain” of this overwhelm by:
Delegating—people love to have a job as it makes them feel involved and important. Share your overload with family and friends and let them take ownership of a task that can take it off your plate.
Prioritizing your list—talk to your partner about your worries and make a list of the top things that are the most important and focus on those first.
Making it fun—remember to enjoy the process. Give yourself a fun reward for achieving each small goal, such as a date night, treating yourself to a massage, or a fun activity.
3. Be Conscious of Your Language
Have you ever said these things or something similar?
“This wedding is stressing me out.”
“I can’t cope with how much there is to do.”
Or, “It’s all becoming too big to handle.”
It’s important to be mindful and aware of the language you are using about your wedding, both internally and verbally.
What you speak of internally creates an outer dialogue.
I’ve had clients with severe migraines who have been saying to themselves, “My job is killing me.” They then wonder why their body is creating an illness to stop them from going into the office when they have given their mind clear instructions.
The number one job of your mind is to listen to the words you tell it and act on them. So if you instruct your mind that this is stressful, that it is all going to go wrong—you presuppose it.
What we say to ourselves is very important—we literally give our minds the blueprint to figure out a way to make it happen.
Your mind does what you tell it to do.
So instead, you could say:
“I love planning my special day and ticking off my to-do-list.”
“I feel accomplished and can’t wait to walk up the aisle.”
“When I think about our ceremony, it brings me such joy and excitement.”
It is even more powerful when using dynamic, compelling, relevant, and up-to-date language.
So how does this work in your mind? Read on to tip number 4…
4. Create the Perfect Visualization
Your mind picks up the words you say and then makes a picture. So you must act in a way that consistently matches your thinking.
Your mind does not know, and indeed it does not care if what you tell it is right or wrong, good or bad, true or false, helpful or very unhelpful—it just lets it in. Your mind’s job is to act on the pictures you see.
What the mind sees, it moves toward, and whatever you focus on increases.
To help you focus on having your perfect day, you can create a vision board. You train your mind to focus on exactly what you want when you do this. The pictures make you think, “I am achieving this!”
This is a technique I used for my first best-selling book.
You can create a vision board, vision book, or use apps on your cell phone or device to create your dream wedding. Whatever works for you as long as you see your vision board every day.
When you see your vision board daily, it makes you visualize, and a world of possibilities opens up and helps your mind think of how to take action towards your wedding goal and inspires you when you see it; you can achieve it.
If you can dream it, it’s inside of you. Your vision board then takes it outside of your head so you can look at it and make it happen in your reality.
So instead of worrying about the finer details of your table centerpieces, switch these thoughts around and focus on the best outcome you can possibly have for your wonderful wedding, and your mind will be inspired to work out how to make it happen.
5. Reprogram Your Subconscious
Would you love to wake up knowing your wedding isn’t a chore but the most thrilling and exciting event in your life?
Would you relish that all your dreams are achievable and can be accomplished?
Would you love to feel so present in the magical moment of your special day?
Then you may want to explore my Coping With Wedding Stress self-hypnosis audio today…
You see, our minds are very clever at being stubborn and keeping us stuck where we are—in this case, stress and overwhelm. We have these blocks on a deep subconscious level, which can feel very frustrating.
Just when we think we have made a breakthrough, our minds catapult us right back to our comfort zones, keeping us going around in circles.
Making a conscious effort to eliminate wedding stress from our lives can feel like an uphill struggle and hard work (and let’s face it, you have enough in your spreadsheet).
It’s a daily conscious habit and change in our core belief system, one we need to keep working on to get right.
Trying my Coping With Wedding Stress self-hypnosis audio will take all of that hard work away. It aims to help you relax and rewire your mind and step into calmness over stress, let go of any pre-wedding tension and be able to savor every moment to treasure your special wedding day.
Your Coping With Wedding Stress audio creates a visual and emotional picture in your inner mind to manifest exactly what you want for your big day by creating a blueprint that you then repeat.
The beauty of this is that it’s all done for you, so all you need is twenty minutes of your day to relax and listen, whether you wish to do this before going to sleep or finding a blissful space in the day.
When you can equip your mind to deal with anything, you are no longer at the whim of what life throws at you, and you get to take your power back.
What’s more, as you begin to unwind and step into a state of calmness, you will start to feel more excited about your treasured day, and your mind will be focused on taking different actions. You’ll find you’ll come up with better solutions, inspired ideas, and be able to approach your wedding planning with complete ease. If you’re ready to stop fretting about the festivities and step into a headspace of happily ever after, explore my Coping With Wedding Stress audio today.